Rachel C Vane aka RC Vane

Web + Brand Design

On Being Visible (i.e., not blending in)

By rcvane

seenI have recently started to feel more “seen”. Like people are meeting me, either online or in person and saying – “Hey, I think I like you. Let’s connect.” Or “I see you have a need and maybe I can help.” As first I thought it was just a coincidence. But in about a month all of these things happened:

#1

I met a new friend, Happy Fish Owner Jeremy Richards, online and we started a weekly accountability meeting. Then, just a few days later, I met him in person — dropping off his daughter at the same daycare, in the same room as my son!

#2

On a Saturday, I was taking my son to a Birthday party for a friend from his Karate dojo. I had this strong urge to wear a WordPress shirt, even though it’s not typically my first choice. I wore it. Another father at the party (now another new friend!) said “Hey, you use WordPress?”. I explained I make a living using WP! He happened to be a UX designer looking for work, and potentially someone I could hire for some contract work.

#3

I head to dinner with a close friend. We live kind of far from each other, so we connect once a month. Near the end of our dinner she says if I needed any help with some work, she could possibly pick up some Adobe Illustrator tasks.

#4

I went to a direct sales clothing party, on a Sunday. To be honest, I was dragging and not super excited to go… however, I really wanted to support my friend who’s selling the clothes. Anyway, I was there for like 5 minutes when one woman said something I completely connected with and instead of just smiling without saying anything (this is how I tend to be), I loudly said, “Oh, I like you!” and I reached across the table, shook her hand and introduced myself. A nearly instantaneous new friend!

Now, you may have this kind of stuff happen to you all the time. If so, this post isn’t for you.

This post is for my fellow wallflowers… and my extroverted counterparts who may like to be heard, but are still rarely “seen”.

So why am I telling you all of this and what does it have to do with business?

  • If people are going work with you, you have to be visible. 
  • If your business is going to really grow and have impact, you have to more visible.

What “Being Visible” does NOT mean in this post:

  • Being the center of attention
  • Having a huge Facebook, Twitter or Email following
  • Talking the most or the loudest
  • Trying to be the coolest or the most perfect
  • Interrupting or Bikeshedding

What “Being Visible” does mean in this post:

  • Openness to new connections
  • Asking for help
  • Sharing your story
  • Seeing opportunities and jumping on them (even if they don’t work out)
  • Showing the messy stuff (which typically means being vulnerable)
  • A willingness to look silly or be embarrassed
  • Speaking about what’s really important

For introverts, like myself, these things have been a life-long challenge. And, these types of visibility can also be hard for extroverts.

No matter which side of the introvert/extrovert spectrum you tend to, we’re all used to being visible and invisible in certain ways.

“Being  Visible” is moving beyond your self-imposed limits to really show up, being open to opportunities and being willing to risk failure, rejection, etc. to follow through on those opportunities.

This is the thing that took forever to click in my brain about business networking, you have to truly show up, see opportunities for connections and then follow up with those connections.

While on the surface this may not seem to be about marketing, it is EXACTLY what this post is about.

The more truly visible you are, the more connections you make, the more people know about you and what you do, the more clients you will have.

Remember “Being Visible” is not an easy path.

  • Looking messy is, well, messy.
  • Asking for help blows.
  • You will not want to embarrass yourself.
  • You may will want to quit, repeatedly.
  • You will have to fight being so damn “independent”.

But the rewards can be epic.

  • So many referrals you don’t know what to do with yourself.
  • People going out of their way to offer help.
  • People sharing you and your message.
  • Things just seeming to “fall into place”.
  • Support, support, support – on all levels.

Like everything else, it’s all practice.

The more you practice putting the real you out there, the more your brain will allow you expand your visibility.

So go, practice.

Promote, promote, promote… and remember the key is the follow up.

By rcvane Leave a Comment

promote

I know you…

You’re scared of inundating people.

You don’t want to be annoying.

You think people already get too many emails.

You don’t want to feel “salesy”.

If you don’t have these thoughts, you probably have no problem sending out 100 tweets, 20 Facebook posts and 5 emails to your list per day. And this post is not for you.

This post is for the doubter, the over-thinker, the one who’s afraid someone might get peeved at you or do something unimaginable, like unsubscribe from your email list! Egads!

Here’s the thing about websites. Or that online course. Or that new product.

If you want online success, you have to market.

Yes, I said the M” word. Let’s not tiptoe around that puppy. You may squirm. You may think it’s beneath you. You may think people will reach out to you when there interested and you shouldn’t bother them.

Yes, I get it. I once believed and thought all of  those things too.

Let’s get into this.

1. Marketing is UNCOMFORTABLE.

If you have any doubt in yourself, your service, your product, your experience, your pricing or your whatever, marketing is uncomfortable.

If you feel even a tad bit nervous about putting yourself “out there”, marketing is uncomfortable.

If you’re an empathic person, marketing is uncomfortable.

I am often thinking about what other people might be thinking and feeling. This makes it hard to repeatedly promote things, because every damn time I send an email, post on Facebook or Instagram, I belabor “Is this too much?”, “Am I being too salesy?”. And that belaboring… that is exhausting and uncomfortable.

If you have thoughts that you’re “too good” to have to do marketing, I would argue you are uncomfortable with marketing, because you have an issue with truly being visible.

2. Marketing is about being VISIBLE.

I’m the first to admit, this sounds so much more simple than it actually is in real life. Being visible requires your willingness to put yourself out there, but also an internal muscle with being okay to use your true voice. I call this a “muscle”, because it needs strength training. Every time you put something, say something or do something true to you… you’re working that “muscle”. 

Most of us (especially us ladies) are taught not to rock the boat, not to make too much noise, that someone knows better than us, and so after years of this training, many of us have lost our voices.

Being truly visible requires an ability to not freak out if someone calls you out, reports you as spam, or tells you to do x, y and z differently. Because those things will happen.

And the stronger your “muscle” becomes, the less often these things will break your heart and the more courage you’ll have to keep going.

3. Marketing must be REINFORCED. (i.e. Follow up!)

So there’s this thing called “Effective Frequency” – the number of times it takes someone to see something before they take some action (like buy something). This is why marketers use jingles, stories and catchy tag lines that can be easily repeated.

While slogans are good for big dogs like Coke, the concept of effective frequency has a direct application to internet marketing.

New things take time sink in. Give your audience the time and the repetition they need to fully understand what you’re offering. People need to see, hear, or experience things several (or more) times to really “get it”.

So, if I attend your webinar, look at your sales page and get one email from you… I probably won’t buy. Now, if I have a compelling reason to buy AND you have made it stupid easy for me by sending follow up emails, I’ll be more likely to buy. I’m not saying saying send 5 emails a day and beat me over the head. I am saying that following up with the people who’ve shown any interest is crucial to being successful online. 

Here’s a recent example:

One of my clients recently launched a new online course. She needed 20 sign ups. After her webinar, she had one sale. However, within 2 weeks she signed up 30 people. How did she do this? By following up with people. She sent a few follow-up emails to prospects and the big key for her was offering a free 20-minute call for people trying to decide if the course was for them.

Now, think about your business.

Are you willing to be uncomfortable, put yourself out there, and follow up (and keep following up)?

If you take nothing from this post, please take this (as I have learned this the hard way several times): follow up, follow up and follow up some more.

Most people will not convert by reading your sales page. For those of us who are not super internet famous, I firmly believe most people require a quick chat with us on a call before they open their wallet.

Like, what do you have to lose?

So, get out there and toot your own horn. Promote yourself. Follow up and follow up some more! If you think it’s too much – it’s probably not. People might unsubscribe. They might call you names. And that’s truly okay.

Did you like this post? I’ll share more thoughts on marketing in the next few weeks. Pop you’re email address into that red box below and you’ll get an email when I publish my next one.

Photo by the talented pair at Boy Girl Beauty World.

Underestimating Everything & Giving up on “The End”

By rcvane 2 Comments

rideWhen people have asked me how I’ve been doing recently, I’ve been responding with this little analogy:

I feel I’m running a marathon and I’m so burnt out that I’m crawling to the finish line. And I feel like the finish line should be soon, but it’s really 13 miles out… ’cause I’m only at the half way point.

So, have you ever underestimated how much time and energy something would take?

No, I mean like, REALLY underestimated how long and how much energy something would take. That’s where I’ve been. But not just for one thing or one project. I have severely underestimated how much time and energy every damn thing in my life and my business would take for the past 3 months (at least).

To try to catch up I’ve worked many weekends and late hours… hence the crawling.

And it’s started to wear on me. Stuff is slipping through the cracks.

Have you ever:

  • Forgot to email a client that you were running behind?
  • Missed a scheduled meeting with a new client or prospect?
  • Opened email first thing and responded to “urgent” things all days, instead of doing what is really important?
  • Tried, yet again, to implement a new project management tool?
  • Forgot to pick up your son from school?
  • Wondered why you didn’t just take the easy way out and go “get a job”?
  • Wanted to dig a hole and stick your head in it?

Yeah… me too. And I realized something.

I like to imagine there is an end.

For example, I like to tell myself that once:

  • That one project is done, I’ll be in the clear.
  • I reach a certain amount of income, I’ll be happy.
  • I successfully follow a system for everything, deadlines will always be met.
  • My inbox is cleared out, I’ll be less stressed.
  • My calendar notifications are fixed, I’ll never be late or miss another meeting.
  • I stop opening my inbox early, I’ll never be sucked into the black hole of urgency.
  • I fix my life and business, all we be well.

And then:

  • Another project gets more complicated, after I wrap up that other one.
  • I reach and exceed my income goal, and cashflow is still an issue.
  • I follow a system, but still miss a deadline because I get sick and my baby gets sick.
  • Clear out my inbox, but still feel stressed.
  • Fix my notifications, so I get to the meeting on time… but get 4 phone calls because I was late picking up my son.
  • Didn’t check my email first thing, but still focused on urgent, not important, things.
  • Got my business and life to certain point… and then had NEW problems to solve.

And so, there is no end.

While I am beginning to turn around my ship of underestimating projects (think adding in LOTS of buffer, as I have LOTS of life that can complicate things), there really is no end.

Unexpected things pop up all the time and there truly is no destination for business and life. Once you get to certain benchmark, there’s always something you didn’t expect.

One of my new favorite songs is “Ride” by Twenty One Pilots:

“Yeah, I think about the end just way too much. But it’s fun to fantasize. … Oh, oh, I’m falling, so I’m taking my time on my ride.”

On more than one occasion I’ve blasted it, and loudly sung along in my car. (Especially after successfully dropping off all 3 kids to there schools/daycares.)

Since there truly is no end, what can we do?

Embrace the ride.

Make a plan knowing that things will probably not go as smoothly as you’ve laid out, and then hold on, go for the ride, adapt and communicate your heart out. Realizing you’re safe may help you with embracing the ride. For most of us, this is not life or death… this is the details of life. While our reptilian minds may feel like a failure or a mistake is life-threatening, it typically never is.

Know that you will sometimes disappoint people.

This one is EXCRUCIATING for me. I absolutely hate disappointing people. I hate saying no. I’ve had to practice more and more being honest and just say, “Nope, I can’t do this for you right now.”

People, we’re all figuring this stuff out. So sometimes we will forget things, sometimes we’ll get sick, sometimes we’ll say yes when we should’ve said no or sometimes we’ll be so depressed about the world we just can’t bring ourselves to work for a week. Cut yourself some slack. Disappointing people sucks, but for the most part with good communication it can be managed. 

Remember you are a human

I like to imagine I’m a super-human or some shit. That sets me up not only to disappoint others, but to constantly disappoint myself. This leads to all kinds of underestimating how much time and energy something will take.

I used to double the amount of time I thought it would take me to do something, and that would work just fine. Now, I have bigger projects, bigger clients, more life details and have triple the amount of time and add a few more days on. Allowing myself a lot of space I need to complete things, is a my way of acknowledging my humanness.

Look at how much you’ve already accomplished.

Six years ago, I was just barely starting my business and I had less than zero business skills. (Seriously, I was an art major.) Today, I somehow meet people who invest thousands of dollars in a service that I’ve also learned how to do in the last six years. And some of my very first clients, are still my clients today. Crazy, people have liked me that much they’ve stuck with me for 3, 4 and even 5 years.

My point is, take a look back, I bet you’ve come a lot further than you’ve given yourself credit for.

 

Shameless plug: I’m going to be guest teaching an online marketing class in Karen McCall’s upcoming course, How to Have a Business that Feeds Your Soul and Your Pocketbook. If you struggle with money ups and downs, there is no one like Karen. I personally have worked with her to help me with my money issues and the work I’ve done with her in shifting my mindset around money has been truly invaluable. So, check it out.

Photo by the talented pair at Boy Girl Beauty World.

For best results: Start with ONE specific, measurable goal for your website

By rcvane 2 Comments

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One.

One is the loneliest number since the number two…

So sad, right?! Only one.

Why? Isn’t 2 or 3 better than one?

Let me ask you one question:

Are you getting the results you want from your website?

If the answer is no, I’m willing to bet you have not really focused and chosen one specific, measurable goal.

Step 1

Think about your business goals.

I like to think about more immediate goals first, like: I need to book 1 client project every a month. Then I break that down with my approximate numbers that I know: Typically about half the people I talk to about their project become clients, so I need to talk to at least 2 prospective clients per month.

Therefore, I need about 2 people per month to contact me via my website to hit my short-term goal.

You can also apply this to longer-term goals: “Build a list of people who may become clients and who also may be interested in products I create in the future.”

Then I brainstorm a bit:

Well, I know that once people read a couple of my blog posts, they some times sign up to receive my posts via email. How could I create more value for people to sign up for my list?

Therefore, I may need to create something of value to give people, so they’ll sign up for my email list to hit my long-term goal of building that list.

Step 2

Decide what the number 1 goal of your site is for your first-time visitor.

Sorry, have “them buy from me” is not it. ;)

The likelihood that a stranger will land on your website and buy something from you is very, very low.

You have to think a bit more like the “networking” process: first they have to know, like and trust you/your business… then they’ll buy. So set your site up to facilitate that process.

Take a few minutes and really think about how people can get to know you/your business in an online space. Is it by reading your blog posts? Seeing your work or process? Doing a free trial? Following you on Instagram? Or maybe the best way really is to have people talk to you/your team directly?

Your goal needs to be something you can measure.

Examples of realistic goals for first-timers to your site (remember you want just ONE):

  • You get their email addy via a free offer or blog subscription 
  • They get a Free-Trial period of your product
  • They see your product/service in action (like in a demo)
  • They request/schedule a Consultation
  • They fill out a contact form
  • Follow you on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/etc. (you have to pick one platform)

All of the above goals can be measured with the results + a free tool you can add to your site, called Google analytics. You can totally make up your own goal, just make sure it’s specific enough that you can measure it.

For example, let’s revisit the example of wanting 2 inquiries per month. If I see that if 100 people (on Google analytics) visit my site in one month and only 1 person (the results) actually filled it out, that leaves me with only a 1% conversion rate.

You may think the easy answer here is to just try to drive 100 more people to my site. While that is a part of the puzzle, it really is only part of it. I need to make sure I’m getting good, qualified visitors (i.e., people who are actually interested in my products service and are in the market to buy).

Since getting more, high quality traffic, takes time and consistent marketing strategies, I recommend looking for some small wins that you can take on right away:

  • Is it easy to see how to contact me? (i.e., Is the contact link in the typical upper right corner of my my site’s main menu?)
  • And is the contact form too long or complex? (People hate long forms)
  • Do I need to give people more info (like the process, a portfolio or testimonials) before they are directed to the contact page?
  • Am I clearly showing and telling the value of my product/service?

Small changes are best, so adjust one thing and see if anything changes in a month. Review your numbers and repeat.

Once your site starts performing well, you can add in an additional goal or 2.

There are lots of opinions on this and I just want to really make sure you know, this is only my approach. There is no right/wrong way, but I want your website to work for you and that’s why I recommend starting with 1.

Next post I’ve dive more into some strategies to achieve goals on your site. :)

Big change, Small change and Chicken Little

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This running a business stuff can be a little much sometimes, right!?

I swear, just when I think I have one thing nailed down something goes and changes. With change comes frequent identity crises, self-doubt and fear, it’s kinda like feeling like chicken little a lot of time.

If we mistake acorns for the sky, we start to run around scattered and scared. And a lot of the time, big or small change feels a lot like the sky is falling.

I have been in an amazing program (Digital Strategy School) the last 6 months that drastically changed my perspective on my industry and my place in it. And it sent me reeling into the “I’m not good enough” and “I’m not qualified enough” and even the “Who do I think I am” head space. Yep, I was screaming inside: “The sky is falling and a Starbucks application is my next step”.

The key is to remember it’s usually small acorns falling, not the sky.

(I know easier said than done.) We can adapt and move forward if we stop panicking about change and start to grow with it. It is uncomfortable? Yes… but that’s where the magic happens, right? ;)

So, I made it… I was just about to embrace my new perspective on who I could be and then I found out about more change: I’m pregnant again! (Total accident and yes, I know how these things happen.) And all of a sudden the sky was falling again. That was a big acorn. Not just in my business, but in my relationships and my family. And so I slept a lot. All business progress slowed way down.

An extra little life is bigger than your average acorn, so I took ample time to digest and adjust, and even start to get a bit excited.

Even if it’s an 8lb acorn, it is still an acorn and not the sky.

Being that we’re doing this life and this business thing, changes are constantly falling on us.

So, if you’ve recently had an acorn or 2 drop on your head:

  • Take a few deep belly breaths
  • Remind yourself the sky is still above you
  • Look around at your stuff, your life, your business and breathe in a little gratitude for how far you’ve come
  • Give yourself permission to stop or slow down so you can adapt
  • Get back to business.

I promise, if you do those things, clarity will miraculously appear. (At least for a day or 2)

A few of major shifts I’ve made in my business: Adding “Strategy” in my email signature (yikes!), adding strategy in every custom design project, and added a new starter site service for businesses that really just need a small pre-made WordPress site to get going.

Some of my latest clients & what they’re are up to in their businesses

By rcvane 2 Comments

I have been SO fortunate in the past year to work with some of the most amazing clients, doing such inspiring work. Today I thank them from the bottom of my heart for trusting me with their businesses. I also want honor them and all the hard work they do to help people.

Kate Beeders, Mindset, Money & Marketing Coach

Kate-b-circle-300Kate’s had a long, prominent journey of entrepreneurship and it’s been exciting to redo her site. (Not ready yet, but will be launching soon). Kate specializes in helping solos get past mental blocks to make more money. She’s got more than a few interesting perspectives and anyone who needs to focus on their bottom line should check out her Cash Infusion Week.

Check out her Cash Infusion Week

Bridget Engel, Certified as a Life Coach, CPCC, and Angel Therapy Practioner

bridget-circle

Bridget Engel is one of the most inspiring people I know. She is so gracious and grateful, I appreciate the example she sets for me on what really “living in the flow” means. She has a Manifestation Mastery Challenge: Manifest Your #1 goal in 7 days  starting in March. It’s definitely worth a peak.

Visit Bridget’s Manifestation Mastery Challenge

Lisa Tener, Award-winning Book Writing coach

lisa-tener-book-writing-coachLisa Tener has been my client for several years and last year we undertook revamping her large site. There are a few special development aspects of the site easier to use and it was a lot of fun to create. Lisa’s built an amazing business and she is truly a remarkable person, and to this day is not only one of my favorite clients, but one of my most favorite people.

Her annual signature program Bring Your Book to Life® starts today & it’s not to late to sign up this year if you want to write your book in 2015. 

Visit Lisa Tener’s site
(^^That’s totally my affiliate link. :)

Jim Parker, Master Certificated Coach

coach-jim-parkerCoach Jim Parker is a Master Certified Coach (MCC) with 18 years of experience, who I consider more than a client — Jim is my friend. We redid his brand and site last year, with beautiful results. His site was even showcased on the StudioPress website. He helps individuals & businesses, but one of the services I love is his free “Find the One” session.

Check Out Jim’s free “Find the One” Session

Vicki Tidwell Palmer, LCSW, CSAT

vickiVicki Tidwell Palmer is simply incredible — from her vast experience and training to studying with people like Pia Mellody, Thich Nhat Hanh and Ram Dass. She focuses mainly on people who are in recovery (12-step programs) and helping people establish healthy boundaries. We created a brand and a new site that already getting her more high-quality leads. Yay!

Visit Vicki’s site

Mary Cravets, Business Coach

mary-cravets-business-coachMary Cravets is an excellent business coach — I should know, she was mine for more than 2 years! She’s excellent at helping business owners really leverage their time by implementing simple systems. Her site is so much fun! Below is a link to one of my favorite pages on her site, her coaching page.

Visit Mary’s Coaching Page

Linda O’Keefe, A Radical Shift

linda-okeefeSo, in full disclosure Linda is my mom! She’s been an LCSW and business owner for more than 20 years. This year she created a brand new process called, “A Radical Shift”.  It’s all about helping the world be a more peaceful, from the inside out by living life from your “essential self”.

Visit A Radical Shift’s Site

Your WordPress website’s security is really, really, really important.

By rcvane 4 Comments

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I love WordPress. It gives small entrepreneurs the power to create and manage their own websites and blogs and that is incredible.

Remember back in the day when you had to have a WebMaster? It was a while ago, so maybe you don’t remember. It’s pretty unheard of for small businesses to have one anymore. While it’s a good thing that people can manage their own sites, in my experience, even with the best of intentions, a website can sit on the back burner if you’re not regularly blogging or using it for any online marketing.

And here in lies the problem: You stop logging into your site. You stop backing it up and updating the software. Then you get hacked.

Hackers are just getting better and faster.

Over the holiday, more than 100,000 WordPress sites were hacked into because of a weakness in a slider software (a plugin). Three of my previous client’s sites were hacked, 2 blacklisted and it took a a lot of time and money to get everything fixed. It was the most stressful thing that’s ever happened to my business in the almost 5 years I’ve been self-employed.

Here’s the thing: if you have a WordPress site and you’re not logging in weekly to update it, hire someone to do it for you. Today. (I do it – email me for info, my plans start at $85/mo. Or you can try one of these companies.)

Of course, there is never a 100% guarantee you can keep your site from being hacked. But if you’re keeping it updated weekly, you’re doing the most important thing to protect your site.

Here’s the other things I recommend you do:

1. Make a plan to upgrade your hosting this year. A little bit more money per mo. can go a long way to protecting your site, i.e. piece of mind.

Hosts with Managed WP hosting: (you can click here to read more about the pros/cons and read about other providers)

  • FlyWheel (I’m in the process of moving all of my own sites here)
  • BlueHost’s WP Hosting (not their regular plan) – Use only if you don’t think you’ll need frequent customer support.
  • WP Engine

2. Use Google Apps for your email.

Why use Google apps for yourdomain.com email? Avoid spam. Avoid being blacklisted. Next-to-no downtime. (Yes, you can still use your email client of choice: apple mail, outlook, etc.)

3. If you don’t want to use any of my other recommendations: use Sucuri.

While this has been a crazy time for me, I know that this will only lead me to serve my clients better and I hope this post helps you.

Leaving behind a constant state of rush.

By rcvane 3 Comments

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The other day I was driving on the freeway. There was a car behind me that clearly wanted to go faster than me… she was all up on my bumper. I got anxious. Then angry. When some cars in front of me got out of my way, I sped up as fast as I could to get away from her and get to my exit. Yeah, that backfired.

Not only did she stay nearly touching my bumper as I sped up, she was getting off on the same exit. And as I tried to get over to turn right, she swerved over into the right lane next to me, blocking me from getting over. I totally lost my cool. I yelled. I actually even honked my horn.

Then we had to sit at a red light next to each other. A wee bit awkward.

I felt a bit ashamed of my behavior. Then I saw bit of my life and business flash before me as I made a bunch of connections in my head and had a total “Aha!” moment.

I hate being rushed. And pressured.

(Sorry Grandma Jane, ‘dislike’ is just not strong enough. I really hate it.)

And I do it to myself. Even if it starts from another person – I’m the one that chooses to take it on make it my problem.

For years, I ran my business like everything was a rush.

I made myself believe I needed to rush projects and any sense of urgency from a client made me jump with putting out their fires, which lead to more fires and more hoses for other clients.

I felt anxious, angry, resentful. I exhausted myself. 

And there was no real bottom. There was no “Aha” in the midst of everything.

There was only a small voice that told me I could choose to do it differently. It started like a whisper and got louder the more I could no longer tolerate the rushing, the pushing.

So I took small steps.

  • Slowly began to create and implement systems (with some amazing help.).
  • Began to really be irritated with myself when I overbooked.
  • Started to stager project start dates.
  • Started to say no more and referred more people out.
  • Began to consider most email as important, but not urgent.
  • Made a tiny bit more space in my schedule.

It took some time. Patience. Perseverance.

And it’s better. It’s actually so much better, I didn’t really realize it until I went a little crazy about that driver in a hurry.

I made her hurry, my worry. And I thought: “Wow that’s exactly how I used to run my business… responding to my perception of how rushed I thought other people were.” The funny part? Most of the time I was wrong. Most people just wanted clear expectations of when something could be done – not that it needed to be done that minute.

There are those few people that really are always in hurry and as long as we are clear and realistic about timelines, they can decide if that works, or not. And either way is just fine (although, quite honestly, it took me some time to be alright with it).

These changes have led to more happiness, ease, respect and understanding in my client relationships. (Awesome).

Look, we’re not driving sick or injured people to a hospital.

We don’t need to rush.

(Unless you want to and if you want to – go for it!)

You create the business you want.

By rcvane 4 Comments

Last week I was sick. And I mean really – can’t get out of bed, feeling utterly miserable, pounding head, overflowing stack of tissues – sick. I finally returned to work on Friday, because I couldn’t stand being away any longer. Taking that forced step back, I saw a bigger picture.

I need my work. Like, really need it.

I am the most “in life” when I’m creating something and/or figuring out how to do something. And that pretty much sums up my work.

It’s not like I’ve found my dream career. Or the perfect job. Or now that I’m doing something that is awesome my life is a picturesque fairy tale. It’s like I’m using the things I’m naturally good at with a bunch of determination, perseverance and a whole lot of things I’ve learned. And I’m proud of the business I have created.

Here’s one of my favorite quotes of all time. Some people say George Bernard Shaw said it, other people say he didn’t. If he did, I say “Thank you, George.”

life-is-about In a life cluttered with myths of “Big breaks”, “Opportunities missed”,  “Timing not being right”, “Talent being the key to success”, “Potential squandered”, “Everything works out” and “Go find yourself”, I have found much comfort in this quote.

These myths can be so deep in us we’re not even aware they’re acting on us.

Keeping us small. Taking our power away from us. Making us victims. Creating nightmare business relationships. Here’s how some of those beliefs used to show up for my business (and sometimes still do):

  • Lack of systems and processes
  • Bad organization
  • Under charging
  • Comparing myself of others
  • Poor communication when I feel guilty, pressured or angry
  • No boundary setting
  • Lack of clarity

It took me a while to understand I could actually make this stuff how I wanted it. And my clients actually appreciate that.

You can create the business you want. But you need a few things to do:

1. You have to believe you can. You have to believe it’s not all up to luck, timing, or an imaginary guy in the sky.

This is a process. We’ve learned for so long that we can’t, the journey to believing we can is gradual and comes in increments. Once we’ve dealt with it on one level, it resurfaces later at a deeper level and we have to take ownership of it again, let it go, move forward… and repeat.

2. You have to have experienced enough to know living differently than you’ve seen and been taught is actually possible.

When we’re young, we live one way, in one culture. There are unspoken norms and paths we expect our lives will take. Once we have travelled a little to see that other people live differently, grow up a bit to find out most paths we take are much different than we expected and we read books and articles to learn about what is happening or has happened in the world… we begin to develop a larger view of what is possible in life and ideas about what we can create for ourselves.

3. You can use what you’re good at and build upon that.

The concert pianist was not born knowing how to play the piano. Born with a talent for tone and rhythm, the concert pianist learned how to play the piano and practiced, A LOT. And probably got rejected. More than once. At some point may have doubted the decision to devote so much life to learning and practicing the piano. Wondered if they could keep going, if it was worth it and maybe even took a part time job at Starbucks to pay the bills. The point is talent and natural skills are a jumping off point, not a final destination. You decide what to build.

Join me as I get some of these off my chest:

  • I once believed that if I was talented enough, I’d be an overnight success.
  • I once believed being successful meant I would have no more problems.
  • I once believed “successful” people were just luckier or smarter than me.
  • I once believed I would one day get my big break and I would be famous, envied and rich (if I hadn’t already missed my opportunity).

And to create the business I want – I have had to continually acknowledge, grieve, move on from these beliefs and see where they are holding me back.

How about you?

What beliefs are holding you back?

Good things, Not-so-good things and Finding Happiness

By rcvane 2 Comments

good-not-so-good

Do you ever think to yourself…

  • “Once I accomplish this, I’ll be so happy.”
  • “Once I have this many clients, my business will be great!”
  • “Once I get through this shit storm my life will be better.”
  • “Once I can afford that, I’ll finally be able to relax.”

Or maybe your the comparison type, you look at people’s Facebook pages and you think:

  • “If I just had a relationship and maybe a couple kids…”
  • “If only my life was so perfect and awesome and fun and…”

Maybe you think these things, maybe you don’t. Maybe you’ve even read some blog posts about how being a successful and having an awesome-looking life is so hard. Hard because there are higher standards to live up to, hard because everything gets more complex, taxes get higher, blah, blah, blah.

My life and business has been more challenging than ever these past few months. And I often find myself unconsciously scrolling through people’s Facebook profiles, websites and blogs and thinking about how awesome their lives and businesses must be. But check this out, even though I’ve been the most challenged, I’ve had some the best events of my career happen to me:

  • A site I recently finished is showcased on the StudioPress Showcase. (Which is a BIG deal and means more traffic to my site).  (Look for Coach Jim Parker) Link to just it’s direct listing can be found here.
  • I was quoted in an article and it’s also driving traffic to my site. (Thank you, HARO)
  • I am getting steady, strong leads for new clients.

These things are really good.

And getting that site is the showcase is one thing I thought once I’d accomplished, I’d be happy.

I thought it would mean I was finally successful – and that my work would be somehow validated.

And it seems everywhere I turn online I end up somewhere where someone is talking about how we allude ourselves into believing that one day life will be better, we’ll be more happy, we’ll achieve something that will make the pain of our daily struggles disappear – but that day never comes. Like a quote, a video…

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. – Plato

 

 

From the video: “We manage to never really connect present moment and find fulfillment there, because we are continually hoping to become happy in the future. And the future never arrives.”

And so, I now have a larger perspective.

Once we achieve the things we think will make us happy in our business, we’re probably not happy – because we’re concerned about hitting the next benchmark. And perhaps more honestly, because those achievements did not eliminate struggle and pain from our lives.

We tend to think of happiness is the elimination of pain and success the elimination of struggle.

But they are not. They are in addition to. So we must make room for the good things. We must actively let them in. We must celebrate them when they happen.

To feel happier and more successful in our businesses and our lives, we must not focus on what we think will make us happy and successful and we must stop, look around, and feeling happy and successful in that moment.

Even if it is only a moment.